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How can you be in a relationship and still feel lonely?

How did you end up in a relationship with someone who manipulates or abuses you mentally or physically? 

How did you get everything you ever wanted and still feel so empty inside? 

Is this person really the one for me? 

Should I take that job and still go to school?

Life is full of questions, uncertainties, and roadblocks. And, at the end of the day, we just want to be happy. 

Happiness is fleeting. It isn't dependent on something else or someone else. It is something within you, and when I learned this while I was deep in my depression on a suicidal watch, I punished myself for not being better. I felt guilty for not being happy and shamed myself for not being where or who I wanted to be. 

Life is a beautiful journey, but we overcomplicate it with comparisons, obsessions, and attempts to control. 

There is more for you. 

Learn how to SHOVE IT - it is your time.

The SHOVE IT Foundational Course is waiting for you. What i...

I have learned that everything starts as a normal day. Like, the day I learned, I was diagnosed with cancer. It was such an out-of-body experience feeling. I remember thinking, they can't be talking about my body, something is gone wrong, this is not true! 

I kept thinking if I never called back or didn't go to the appointment, everything would still be the same. How in one minute can everything in life change?

I remember so vividly the phone call I received to learn at 12 years old learning my uncle had taken his life, and then again at 15 years old when my dear friend took her life. Or the moment when my best friend had a miscarriage at 12 weeks, I remember the devastation of not hearing a heartbeat or when a family I was supporting lost their homes to Calfornia fires twice in one year. 

Nothing can prepare you for some of the things that happen while you journey down the path of life, or so we have been taught. As we have heard so many times before, heartache in life is inevitabl...

I tended to overthink everything. When I began creating my own business, there were so many decisions to make and many uncertainties about the road ahead. I felt so overwhelmed.

The truth of it was that it wasn't just my creating my business that caused my anxiety. I had been struggling with anxiety for so long. My doctor suggested I go on antidepressants and social anxiety pills in high school to calm my nerves and help me cope with everyday living.

It is so easy to medicate and get lost in the world of drugs, alcohol, sex, food, or shopping. In life, we have zero control over so much, and it is really challenging sometimes. The problem is we run, avoid and distract ourselves from our fears and our issues, and our struggles. There is a huge part of you wanting to live big, wanting to feel relieved, and it is possible; you are so close you just need to learn how to SHOVE IT.

I have high anxiety still to this day. The difference is I have learned how to leverage it. If you have anxie...

Where do insecurities come from? How did you become the person you are?

I remember the exact moment I was looking in the mirror thinking, how did I get here? How is this my life?

Have you ever wanted to be someone else?

I used to dream of living a different life. What I have discovered over my journey is that it is not that I wanted a different life; I wanted my permission to live my own. I cared so much about what other people thought, and I was so scared of not being good enough so I would take myself out of the game before anyone else could. I would tear myself down in my mind, and I believed in every negative comment I ever received.

I felt alone in a room full of people. I felt misunderstood and overlooked. I was quiet and reserved, so no one had a reason to notice me, and those stories in my mind went wild.

I developed insecurities I brought with me to my career, relationships, and every morning to the mirror, and they held me back. I developed codependency, people-pleasing,...

I've been both overweight and underweight.

I have struggled with my body image.

I tried multiple diets, been on various exercise regimes, and have followed and unfollowed thousands of wellness experts, subscribed and unsubscribed to various apps, and craved to find answers from various influencers. I got certified by the Institute of Integrative Nutrition and the Institute of Functional Medicine to figure out how to finally, actually gain the body I had always dreamed about.

When you are overweight, you condemn those who are thin. When you are underweight, food becomes an impossible feat haunting you with calories and fat. Both sides of the coin are terrifying.

And, I got the body I wanted. I figured it out, and guess what? My life still had problems, my heart still got broken, and I still had stressed; why? Because what we think is the issue is not actually the issue. Food and weight are only but a gate weight to our truth. You will learn that in module 7 of the SHOVE IT Foundatio...

I love, love. I love the way it feels when you are fully present with someone or something like an idea. The energy flowing through you when you have found something you are completely enlivened with, there is nothing better.

You can be in love with an idea, with a moment, with an object, an animal, or a person, and it can make you feel ecstasy so great you feel you can do anything.

The trouble with love is it is risky. The euphoria changes with time, so you can go from a high to a low quite quickly. It can become agonizing and painful. You can go for a new opportunity with excitement and jazz, for it not to work out right away. Defeating. You can fall passionately in love with someone who chooses to leave. Excruciating. The dark side of love is it can make you think and believe in all types of untruths.

Life is full of failure, rejections, heartbreaks, and disappointments. Learn to handle all of life's burdens in the SHOVE IT Foundations Course.

SHOVE IT to anyone who has ever mad...

Isn't it interesting to think about the reason someone treats you poorly or is moody towards you? It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them! When someone mistreats you, it isn't because you are unloveable. It is because that person doesn't love themselves. Say that again for the people in the back; it is not that that person doesn't love you. It is that that person doesn't love themselves.

I'm offering you something to try on: shift your focus to your compassion and empathy. You are growing nonstop doing this work, and you are just so incredible. Love yourself well, and the rest of the world will reflect the love you hold in your heart.

It's so small.
It's so basic.
And, yet, it drives YOU bananas.

"Put the dishes in like this, not like this. You get maximum capacity this way!"

"She puts on the dishwasher every night. It drives me crazy!"

"He only puts the dishwasher on when it is overfull, bowls over top of cups and all, things don't get cleaned that way!"

For you, it may not be the dishwasher, but in every relationship, there are those silly, small things that cause so much distress and tension within your home.

It could be the way that he walks heavily in the morning, the way she leaves her purse perfectly in the middle of the hallway, how he burps every night after dinner, or how she leaves her makeup all over the vanity in the bathroom. It is usually predictable, common, and casual. And, most moments, you could do without it!

Let's point out one important truth here. The truth is you do it too.

There are things that YOU do your partner cannot stand. Whether or not he or she tells you is a different story, bu...

Have you ever been in a relationship and still felt lonely?

Have you had moments in your current partnership where you have felt misunderstood, isolated, forgotten, or even taken for granted?

I've been working with couples and families for over seven years, and relationship fulfillment is my number one area of study.

Often when we are in relationships for an extended period, we stop seeing our partner. Have you ever hung a picture up on the wall, and after a while, you forget that it is there? Or your best friend has had a tattoo for years, and you don't notice it anymore because you're so used to it being there, but when someone else points it out, it's like "Oh yea, that is there. I forgot."

Well, we often do that with spouses. We stop paying attention to their needs and tending to them in the way we first did because we are used to having them there. We chose to be in this relationship; we married them, so isn't that enough to show our love?

NO!

Relationships fulfillment requi...

“Jenna, my wife keeps calling me her husband, and I think my wife’s definition of a husband is a person who just doesn’t meet expectations.” 

Although my client was laughing when he said this, I could see the genuine concern in his eyes. He seemed exhausted and fed up. Where did the relationship go? It started so great and was magical at the beginning, and then over time, love was lost. They haven’t been happy together for years. 

Intimate relationships are messy and beautiful. They trigger us, challenge us, and also aliven and comfort us. Some days, relationships feel like work, and other days they feel easy and peaceful. 

Love changes, grows and expands in ways we could never have predicted. Love is not just a feeling, but also energy, an energy that requires action. There is a difference between loving someone and practicing love. Practicing love means being unconditional, compassionate, and kind. Loving someone often looks like words without action. Words without action...